


i ain't never ever giving up my pride

by mohritz, shoelaces



Series: this mess was yours, now your mess is mine [6]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Boarding School, Coming Out, Developing Friendships, Developing Relationship, F/M, LGBTQ Themes, M/M, Minor Bellamy Blake/Clarke Griffin, Texting, bellamy comes out to his mom, it goes about as well as you would think
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-05
Updated: 2017-06-05
Packaged: 2018-11-09 12:38:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,331
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11104734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mohritz/pseuds/mohritz, https://archiveofourown.org/users/shoelaces/pseuds/shoelaces
Summary: Octavia snuggles under a blanket and pokes Harper’s cold feet away with her knees, enjoying the familiarity of the evening.It’s movie night with Lincoln, Harper, Monroe, Raven, and Bellamy. Raven had gravely announced when she arrived at Octavia’s room that sitting on the floor was bad for her leg, and was now stretched out across Lincoln’s bed.





	i ain't never ever giving up my pride

**Author's Note:**

> WOW this got really long, we got a bit carried away
> 
> we're very confused by the american school system but w/e we hope its not too unrealistic 
> 
> anyways enjoy!! 
> 
> title is from pride by american authors

Octavia snuggles under a blanket and pokes Harper’s cold feet away with her knees, enjoying the familiarity of the evening.

It’s movie night with Lincoln, Harper, Monroe, Raven, and Bellamy. Raven had gravely announced when she arrived at Octavia’s room that sitting on the floor was bad for her leg, and was now stretched out across Lincoln’s bed. Lincoln, never one for confrontation (even though he could absolutely slam dunk Raven out the window with one hand) had squeezed onto Octavia’s bed with her, which was nothing new for them really. Harper is lying on the floor with her bloody freezing feet up on the bed and her head in Monroe’s lap. Monroe fiddles idly with her braid as they watch the film.

“James Marsden is a national treasure,” Bellamy announces to no one in particular, in that voice he uses when he’s saying something he thinks is important. “That face.”

“No,” Monroe replies idly, not bothering to give a reason. Raven shushes them both, but she’s smiling so Octavia suspects she doesn’t really mind the commentary. These are some of Raven’s favourite evenings, and Octavia can agree with her on that one. They don’t happen often enough to stop being sacred yet, and even though they’ve not been back at school all that long, the break from thinking about work is well deserved in her eyes. It’s never been an activity for the whole group - Murphy and Miller would rather die than watch sappy chick flicks, and she’s never once seen Jasper or Monty sit still and quiet through a movie. Clarke’s well on her way to receiving a golden invitation, which Harper still insists on making for every movie night. This is a group that takes their lame 2000s very seriously. Not just anyone can show up.

She grabs the popcorn bag off of Bellamy only to find it empty.   
  
"Bell, you ate it all again," she scolds, getting up to grab the bag Raven has been hoarding for most of the night.  
  
"Sorry," he says, gaze never leaving the screen. "James Marsden is just so pretty and I get distracted and forget to share."  
  
Octavia rolls her eyes, no stranger to her brother's ways. She's glad, though, that she's been able to make a tradition that started off with just the two of them a regular group occurrence.   
  
The movie ends and Harper stretches, sitting up. "I think I'm done for the night, I'm exhausted."  
  
"Me too," Monroe yawns. "The emotional trauma of Jane and Kevin's will they won't they relationship has made me sleepy."  
  
"It was adorable!" Bellamy retorts, and Monroe just sticks their tongue out in reply.   
  
Octavia is content to just stay where she is, snuggled into Lincoln's side with a bag of popcorn. The others know where the door is, she tells herself. Unfortunately, however, her phone chooses that moment to ring.   
  
"Ugh," she says. "It's on my desk. Bell, could you grab it for me?"  
  
"So lazy," he grumbles, but gets up to retrieve it anyway. Before he can give it to her, however, he freezes at the name on the screen.  
  
"It's mom," he says. "Why the hell is she calling you?"  
  
Octavia's eyes narrow. "What the fuck - give me the phone, Bell."  
  
He doesn't move. She's on the verge of asking Lincoln to get the phone off her brother when Bellamy gives it to her.   
  
"Let me know what she wants," he says, and leaves the room. Monroe, Raven and Harper look concerned, but Octavia just shakes her head.  
  
"Don't worry," she says. "It's fine. Just family stuff."  
  
They nod, bidding Octavia and Lincoln goodnight and heading out to their respective rooms. Lincoln brushes a stray hair out of Octavia's eyes.  
  
"Is everything really fine?" he murmurs. She sighs.  
  
"Mom's calling me, for one, and she's calling me and not Bell, so probably not," she says. "But it's late. I'll call her back in the morning."

Lincoln raises an eyebrow at her. “Octavia, it’s probably important.”

He’s right, of course he is, and she rolls her eyes and calls her mother back.

“Hello?” She does love her mom, but the burden she placed on Bellamy when he was so young had strengthened her relationship with her brother and destroyed it with her mother. “Mom, what’s up?”

“Octavia,” she sighs down the phone, as if it’s effort to even speak to one of her two children for the first time since school started again. She doesn't bother with any small talk. “Listen sweetie, I respect your efforts but I don’t want you getting yourself into any trouble!”

“Do you wanna explain what you’re talking about?” Lincoln gives her a concerned look and she makes a face back at him. “You gotta give me some details here.”

“This group you’ve set up, the gay one?”

Octavia doesn’t even bother to start the conversation correcting her. “Yes?”

“It’s a lovely idea, but I don’t want you and your brother making a reputation for yourselves like this. It’s just not a good image.”

She groans. “What, respecting other people? Oh my God, Mom.”

“I’m not asking you to shut it down. I want you to talk to your brother, see if he won’t step down as the co-President. We don’t want people getting ideas about hi-”

Octavia hangs up. From the look on his face, Lincoln overheard the whole conversation.

"Yeah," she grimaces. "Did I mention that my mom isn't a very nice person?"  
  
"So she has a problem with Bellamy being-"  
  
"Not straight? She doesn't know, probably thinks he's just an ally. I don't think he plans on telling her." Octavia frowns, uncurling herself from Lincoln's side and getting up. "I better go talk to him."  
  
"You want me to come?" Lincoln asks. His concern would be cute if Octavia's mind wasn't already preoccupied with the conversation ahead of her.  
  
"It's okay, you sleep. You look tired," she leans over to kiss him. When she pulls away, he smiles at her and falls back onto the bed.  
  
"I'll probably be asleep when you get back," he warns.  
  
"Considering that your eyes are already closed, that's not much of a surprise," she teases, shrugging on a hoodie and pulling on her slippers. She hears him chuckle as she leaves the room, pulling the door shut quietly behind her.   
  
The corridor is empty, which doesn't surprise her. At 11 on a Friday night, everyone's either asleep or out - and if they're out, they wouldn't be using the stairs to sneak back in. Nobody wants to risk getting caught by Kane. The few who have in the past have horror stories to tell.  
  
She jumps down the stairs, pulling her jumper closer around her.   
  
"This school and their heating systems," she grumbles to herself. "It's always too hot or too cold."  
  
Once she reaches the entrance to the boys' floor, she casts a searching glance around to make sure she doesn't get caught by one of the staff, before heading through the doors and down the corridor. She bumps into Jasper on her way, who gives her a grin and a high five as he walks past. Probably on his way to sneak snacks out of the kitchen, she thinks. Damn that boy and his adorable face that lets him get away with everything and anything.  
  
She knocks twice on dorm 104 before opening the door. Murphy is at his desk, working on some homework with Miller. Bellamy, in contrast, appears to be attempting to see how many highlighters he can balance on top of one another.  
  
"I got bored," he explains, as Octavia walks over with her eyebrows raised.  
  
"You've been back for five minutes," she says. "You didn't get bored, you got antsy because you wanted to know what mom called about."  
  
He doesn't speak for a few moments.   
  
"Yeah," he says eventually. "What did she say?"

There’s no point dancing around the topic. Octavia Blake doesn’t do wishy-washy. “She wants us to distance ourselves from The Gays so people won’t ‘mistakenly assume’ that we like people of the same gender.”

“Translate that into English?” Miller’s swivelled around in the chair.

“She wants us to leave the LGBT+ society because she’s worried people will think we’re gay.”

“Yikes,” Murphy comments, not looking up. She waits to see if he has any more wise words to add to this, but apparently he’s done, so she continues. “I hung up on her.”

“O! She’s just gonna call you back.”

“Sure, but I won’t pick up.”

“Octavia…” Bellamy looks frustrated. “What are we supposed to do?”

Sympathy finally overtakes her anger. “It’s okay, Bell. We’ll figure something out. In the meantime, we don’t have to tell her anything.”

Bellamy nods. Miller and Murphy have abandoned the homework and come to sit on their beds. “I never did tell her I kinda liked guys.” Bellamy says quietly. Miller pats his back.

“She’s barely in your life, you don’t have to tell her anything.” Murphy sounds like he’s fed up with both of their nonsense, but Octavia can tell it’s his own way of helping. “Honestly, guys. Take her money for education and then leave.”

“Murphy!” Bellamy looks scandalised.

“We can’t all be as cold-hearted as you, Murphy.” Octavia kicks him, but she’s grinning, and he smirks back at her.

“Murphy’s ideas aside, what do we do?” Bellamy turns to the group. “As long as my name’s next to that society on our website, she’s gonna keep calling.”

“Does she still have my number?” Miller waves his mobile. “Because I’m staying out of this one. I don’t need any more Blake interventions in my life, especially not from your mother."

"I hope not," Bellamy shudders. "Possessing my friends' phone numbers would be weird, even for her."  
  
"It wouldn't surprise me," Octavia responds, looking over at Sammy. "Has his hat changed since the last time I saw him?"  
  
"I'm glad you noticed," Murphy's smile is proud.  
  
"Maybe I should just tell her?" Bellamy bites his lip. "It won't be that bad."  
  
"You're not doing it on your own," Octavia says immediately. "I'm coming, and we're bringing Murphy for backup."  
  
"For my strength?"  
  
"No. For your cutting sarcasm and witty remarks."  
  
"Aw, Octavia, you flatter me," he grins.   
  
"Trust me. To deal with my mother? We need you," she sighs. "Want me to text her and set something up?"  
  
Bellamy nods, albeit hesitantly. Miller wraps his arms around him in a hug, resting his chin on Bellamy's shoulder. "It'll be fine."  
  
Octavia isn't so sure. She doesn’t want to say ‘I told you so’ but she’s also never wrong.

When she gets back to her room, Lincoln is sat up in the bed. “Your phone kept ringing,” he says sympathetically.

“Ugh, just answer it and tell her me and Bell died in a freak fire or something. She’s met Raven, she’ll believe it.” She flops into her bed, wrapping the duvet around her like a burrito of righteous anger. “Though I guess that would make things worse.”

“I’m not gonna tell your mother that, Octavia.” Lincoln, ever the voice of reason. Opposites attract, she supposes. Swiping away the missed calls notifications, she opens the chat.

**Chat: octavia blake and the criminals**

**octavia:** y’all we have a crisis

 **raven:** LISTEN i’m not going down for this i wasn’t expecting it to actually break through the wall

 **harper:** wat

 **octavia:** idk what that’s abt we have a DIFFERENT CRISIS

_**raven** has deleted a message from the chat_

**octavia:** everyone get your asses online and tell your significant others if they’re not in the chat

 **octavia:** miller murphy bell and lincoln already know this

 **bellamy:** o we can do this in the morning

 **octavia:** secret squads are best mobilised at night

 **miller:** jonty are asleep btw

 **miller:** they left their door open

 **murphy:** we took their sweets and a lava lamp 

 **miller:** its really cool its green and blue and it glows 

 **octavia:** THAT ASIDE my mother just called

 **harper:** oh christ

 **raven:** fuck dat

 **octavia:** me and bell aren’t to be seen associating with u gays

Barely ten seconds pass before an outraged Raven is knocking on her door, and when she goes to open it, she can see Harper padding down the corridor as well, looking as angry as a girl in panda pyjamas can.

“What the fuck does she mean by that?” Raven hisses, clunking into the room as Lincoln heaves himself off the bed to make room for her. Harper just blinks blearily at her. Octavia suspects the chat woke her up, and she’s still too out of it to speak in real life.

"She means that by being in the group, it will give people wrong the wrong impression," Octavia sighs in response, sitting on the floor opposite the bed. Harper curls up next to Raven.  
  
"What wrong impression? That you're not straight?" Raven snorts. "That ship sailed a long time ago."  
  
"How does she even know?" Harper asks.  
  
"The school website. There's a list of clubs and their leaders."  
  
"This is ridiculous!" Raven exclaims. "She's not allowed to dictate your life."  
  
"It's not so much her I'm worried about," Octavia picks at her fingernails. "It's Bell. He still cares what she thinks. He wants to meet her for lunch to tell her."  
  
"Tell her what?"  
  
"That he's pan."  
  
"Why? Fucks sake, Bellamy. Sometimes I think he has a bigger inferiority complex than Murphy," Raven sighs. "And you tried to talk him out of it?"  
  
"Yeah. I think he just wants some sort of closure." Octavia explains. "He thinks that if she has to hate him, he may as well explain himself first."

Lincoln has dozed off against Raven, hands curled tightly in the duvet, and Octavia smiles at him fondly. "Poor thing," she says. "I don't think he's been sleeping well."  
  
Bellamy chooses that moment to poke his head around the door. "Is everyone congregating in here just to have a meeting about our mother? Jeez, O."

“They actually just showed up here. Have you ever tried to stop Raven coming into a room?” Octavia points indignantly at Raven, who shrugs. Harper looks up briefly, then buries her head back into the duvet.

Bellamy sighs. “Look, I don’t like this any more than you do, but you can’t just make our mother out to be evil. She’s our mother!”

“Any better suggestions, Bell?”

“I’ll ask Clarke in the morning.”

“Of course you will.”

“Because she’s the co-President! It’s her society too.”

“Sure. That’s why.” Octavia rolls onto her back, and Raven snorts.

“Neither of you can leave,” Harper speaks up for the first time since she had arrived. “This is our society, we need you guys!”

Bellamy smiles fondly at her. “We’ll figure something out. I know we will.”

“Clarke will.” Raven says lightly. “We’ve known her for like a month and she’s never given up on anything.”

“It doesn’t matter who figures it out as long as someone does.” Bellamy is clearly trying to steer the conversation away from Clarke. Octavia doesn’t need her psychic Blake superpowers to know exactly why that is. Her brother does crushes on a whole different level to anyone else she knows. It would be cute if it wasn’t a little bit scary.

Bellamy’s crush is, for once, not her top priority. The issue of their mother is going to hang over everyone’s heads until someone sorts it out. If that someone is Clarke Griffin, then she guesses it’s just a double whammy.

"Well, I guess this proves how co-dependent we are," Octavia remarks. "The Blake family drama has become a group issue."  
  
"Well, we are basically a family," Raven says, getting up and holding out a hand to Harper. "Come on. I think it's bedtime for this one."  
  
Harper yawns but gets up, rubbing her eyes and following Raven and Bellamy out the door. "See you tomorrow, Octavia."  
  
Octavia smiles. "See you, Harper."  
  
The door shuts softly behind them. Lincoln is still asleep, undisturbed by the chaos. She pulls the blankets over him and goes to sleep in the other bed in fear of disturbing him.   
  
"Night, Lincoln," she whispers.   
  
The next morning, Octavia has been at the breakfast table for about 30 seconds before Clarke sits down next to her.  
  
"Tell me I'm not the only one who thinks Bellamy coming out to his mom is a bad idea, and that he should just ignore her."  
  
"You're not the only one," Octavia yawns, grabbing the milk jug to make herself a cup of tea. "Raven and I told him not to, but you know what he's like when he's had an idea. You can't stop him. I just insisted Murphy and I come too."  
  
"Why Murphy?"  
  
"For if things go south. He's both snarky as shit and also very good at making quick decisions."  
  
Clarke grins. "True."  
  
"I'm sure it won't go that badly, but Mommy Blake has never been one to back down," Octavia sighs. "The whole group is concerned now as well. They seem to think the club might fall apart without Bellamy."  
  
"It would," Clarke says. "I'm good at organisation and planning, but you can tell Bellamy is one of the things holding this group together. He's the first one Jasper calls with a problem, the first one Raven texts to complain about the amount of homework Sinclair gives out - and he doesn't even do Physics!"  
  
Octavia's hands tighten around her mug of tea. "Everyone does care about him."  
  
"Everyone cares about you both," Clarke responds immediately. "You think this group would function without you?"  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"Everyone can see Lincoln loves you to pieces. Bellamy freaks out if he doesn't see you for 24 hours. Jasper may call Bellamy when he's upset, but he looks up to you more than anyone else in the group. You're creator of these movie nights I keep hearing about that Harper swears she couldn't live without. You're important to everyone, and nobody wants to let your mother cause issues that may upset you."  
  
Octavia can't help but smile. "You're awesome, Clarke. Thanks."  
  
"It's all true." Clarke gets up. "I'm going to get some cereal. Want anything?"  
  
"A breakfast muffin would be nice."  
  
"No problem," she says, and gives Octavia a wink before she heads to the food.

As Clarke investigates breakfast, Octavia rests her cheek on the cold table. She hadn’t slept well the previous night, and all she wants is to go back to bed for a few more hours. The canteen is quiet- she had headed down early in the hopes that the others would still be asleep and she could have some time by herself before the meeting, but apparently Clarke isn’t down with that.

As Clarke returns, sliding her breakfast across the table, Octavia sits up to look at her. “I’m kinda freaking out,” she admits. “I really don’t know how this is gonna turn out.”

Clarke looks sympathetic. “I’ve never met your mom, Octavia. But I know she’s lucky to have you two, and if she sees that, you’ll work it out.”

Before Octavia can argue, Murphy has joined their table with a packet of gummy worms and a fanta. “Is that your breakfast?” Clarke says incredulously, and Octavia smiles. She forgets how new Clarke is sometimes.

“Couldn’t be bothered to queue. Don’t tell Bellamy, he’s freaking out enough already without worrying about my diet.”

“You disgust me.” Octavia tells him flatly. “Why am I bringing you along to the Blake family meetup again?”

“I won’t get emotional and if needed, I can destroy the life of anyone at the table.”

“True,” Octavia concedes, and Clarke looks a little concerned.

“Are you two sure this is a good idea?”

“It’s a terrible idea, Clarke,” she replies. “The chances of it ending well are not that good. We gotta do it, though.” She claps a hand over her heart. “For our people.”

Clarke laughs over her bowl of cereal, and even Murphy can't help chuckling. Octavia grins.   
  
The matter of the Blake Family Drama somehow gets lost for a couple of days. Most of the group are busy with school or their assigned jobs from the society. Octavia herself is preoccupied with helping Clarke draw up the plans for the fundraiser dance they want to put on.   
  
It's Saturday morning when the issue is brought up again. The whole group is having breakfast together, a rare occurrence on a weekend. Usually most of them aren't up until the early hours of the afternoon.  
  
"Uh, O," Bellamy starts. "Mom's coming in for lunch today. If you wanted to be there."  
  
Octavia's spoon clatters as it hits her bowl. "Jesus, Bell. You couldn't have mentioned something before now?"  
  
He scowls. "It's not a big deal."  
  
"Okay, whatever. I'll make sure Murph and I are there."  
  
Bellamy nods hesitantly. Clarke looks away from her conversation with Jasper and Monty from the other corner of the table in concern, and Octavia gives her a nod in reassurance.   
  
"All good," she mouths. Clarke gives her a little smile and turns back to Jasper.   
  
She grabs Murphy on their way out of the lunch hall. "You good for lunch today?"  
  
"Momma Blake?" he asks, raising an eyebrow.  
  
"Yeah. She's coming here for lunch. Nobody tell Raven, I don't fancy being expelled because she plotted to blow up the mess hall."  
  
Murphy grins. "Maybe we should tell her."  
  
Octavia just shakes her head in response. "Alright, I'm headed to the library to get an essay done despite every part of my brain telling me to go back to bed."

“I’m a bad influence on you,” Murphy pokes her. “Do your essay, genius.” She doesn’t miss the slight waver in his voice at the word ‘genius’- it’s a sensitive topic- but right now there are bigger fish to fry.

She smiles at him fondly and heads up the corridor to the dorms to meet Lincoln, who is waiting outside their room carrying their stuff.   
  
"Hey," she says. "Ready to study?"  
  
"Yeah, I've got your bag," he says. "Library?"  
  
"Yup. I'm only good until about 2 though. Mom's coming in for lunch."  
  
"No problem," he smiles at her. "You care about your brother a lot."  
  
"I do," she replies, taking her bag off him. "Now come on, I've got to get an essay written before then and I haven't even looked at the question."

The essay is an absolute monster, but luckily for Octavia, crippling anxiety about her dysfunctional family issues are the greatest motivator in the world. She has it done within the hour, and then it’s time to meet Bellamy and Murphy downstairs. She heads to the boy’s corridor and finds their door propped open with Sammy leaning against it like he’s about to try and sell her drugs. Her brother’s friends are so fucking weird.

Inside the room, Miller is wrapped up in a blanket and reading a book. He doesn’t look up when she enters, and she knows better than to try and distract him. She’d seen Finn bear the consequences of that once before, and wasn’t really prepared for a repeat performance. “You two ready?”

Bellamy looks up from his phone and grimaces. “Hardly.”

“Totally,” Murphy swings his legs over the bed and grabs a rucksack. Octavia doesn’t want to know what he feels he needs to bring along to the Blake family meeting. “Especially if there’s gonna be lunch. Will Momma Blake pay for mine?”

“Make sure she give you the money before we start having a serious talk,” Octavia says dryly. “Actually, Bellamy will pay for you.”

“I’ll what?”

“You heard me. Let’s roll.”

Miller gives them a mock salute as they head out the door. There’s a post-it note on Jasper and Monty’s door that reads:

_‘Good luck Bell and O (please don’t come in)!!!’ Jasper + Monty’_

It’s sweet, and now she thinks back, there may have been something on Clarke and Raven’s door upstairs that she hadn’t paid attention to at the time. Honestly, even if this meeting goes to hell, she’ll always have this family to fall back on.

She glances at the door one more time before following Bellamy and Murphy down the stairs and into the lobby. As soon as she sees her mother, she stops short.   
  
Her brother and Murphy have already greeted her, but it's been a while since she's seen Aurora in person. She spent most of the summer away camping with Bellamy, Miller and Lincoln. They went hiking most days and she still remembers the two hours of laughter over Lincoln's attempts to fish. Unfortunately, she also remembers the reasons behind the trip.   
  
"Octavia," her mother says, seeing her.  
  
Bellamy looks over at her, sensing her discomfort.   
  
"Why don't we go and sit down, mom?" he asks.   
  
Aurora nods. "Come on, then. It was nice to see you, John."  
  
"I'm joining you for lunch, I believe," he responds, looking down at his feet.  
  
"I'm afraid this is a family affair-"  
  
"Murphy is joining us for lunch, mom." Octavia cuts her off. "He's been so looking forward to it."  
  
Aurora doesn't say anything. Instead, she chooses to nod and lead the way into the mess hall.   
  
They choose a table near the doors. There are a few other parents visiting, dotted around the hall. Octavia thinks she spots Monroe's mom and dad, and gives them a smile before she sits down.  
  
Bellamy puts on his glasses and casts a look over at the blackboard that the menu is written on. "Okay," he says. "The regular stuff. Soup of the day, sandwiches, and they're also doing a pasta bake thing, it looks like."  
  
"The soup will be fine for me, thanks," Aurora says.   
  
"I'll have the pasta," Octavia says. "Murphy?"  
  
"Same for me, thanks," he nods. He looks uncomfortable and Octavia has to hold in the urge to laugh.  
  
Bellamy nods, getting up to go and tell the kitchen staff.   
  
"It's a little different on days that parents visit," Octavia explains to Murphy, who looks confused. "More like a restaurant. To impress."  
  
Aurora looks at her hands. "Bellamy asked me to come today, Octavia."  
  
"And that was his decision," Octavia responds. "Not mine."  
  
Bellamy slides back into his seat. "I miss anything?"  
  
"Not at all," Murphy drawls. Octavia kicks his shin in warning.   
  
"Uh, so, mom," Bellamy begins as the food is brought over. "How are you?"  
  
"I'm fine, Bellamy, thank you. I've been working from home more recently." Her voice is sharp, a tone to it that Octavia has come to know well. "It's a shame you and your sister spent most of the summer away. It would have been nice to see you and not sit in silence instead."  
  
"You know why we took that trip," Bellamy responds. His voice is quiet. Murphy frowns, and Octavia can tell he doesn't understand. He’s fiddling with his phone under the table, and she can see a string of sweating emojis texted to Emori. She feels a little bad for him being put right in the middle of this drama, but it’s good to have someone impartial there.

“So, John!” Her mom is clearly trying to start a pleasant conversation. “Are your parents not visiting today? Busy with work?”

“Does dead and in prison count?” Murphy replies without missing a beat. Ouch.

The look on her mom’s face is so funny that Octavia wonders if laughing would be horribly inappropriate, but Murphy looks slightly amused himself. He’d been waiting for that one, she suspects.

“I’m so sorry,” Aurora starts.

Murphy shakes his head. “Don’t be, things are good.” He takes a large mouthful of pasta, possibly to avoid being asked any further questions. Their mom turns back to them. Thanks for that one, Murphy.

“So, Bellamy, you said you had something you wanted to tell me?”

“Uh, yeah,” Bellamy looks a little frozen on the spot. Octavia nudges him with her foot under the table. It’s a gesture that is both encouraging and says ‘don’t drag this out any longer than physically necessary’. Bellamy swallows. Murphy has his phone out again and Octavia can clearly see both ‘homicide’ and ‘suicide’ in whatever the hell he’s telling Emori. That’s fair, she supposes.

“Mom, you know how you told Octavia you didn’t want people thinking I was gay?” Crunch time. “Well, I’m pansexual.”

Their mom’s face cycles through about twelve different emotions. “You like boys?” She says finally. “Bellamy?”

“Um. Yes.” Bellamy looks a little lost. Octavia starts preparing to fight.

“Oh my God, he’s your boyfriend, isn’t he?” Aurora points at Murphy who nearly spits pasta across the room. “You’re dating this boy!”

“Yeah, me and Bellamy are totally fucking. All the time.” Murphy rolls his eyes, apparently complete unfazed by this. Octavia glares at him.

"Murphy!" Bellamy looks almost scandalised. Octavia grins.  
  
"Well, if he is fucking Bellamy, he's cheating on his girlfriend," she says to her mother. "Someone should let Emori know."  
  
"I think she'd probably support it," Murphy looks up, as if considering. "She thinks Bellamy is cute."  
  
"Okay, I'm stopping this conversation right now," Bellamy cuts in. "Mom, they're just being protective."  
  
Aurora doesn't speak, choosing instead to focus on her soup. Octavia looks straight at her.  
  
"Look, mom," she says. "The fact that I have found a better family here with these guys than I ever did at home probably tells you more than I could put into words. Bellamy finds boys attractive: so what? So does Murphy. So do I. It changes nothing."  
  
Bellamy looks over at her, expression fond. She continues. "He's your son, sure, but he's also my brother. He's been worrying about this ever since he decided he wanted to tell you. So suck it up and be there for him."  
  
"Yes, Octavia," Murphy whispers, holding his hand out for a high five under the table.   
  
Aurora looks up from her soup. "I think it would be best if I left."  
  
"I think so too-"  
  
"Murphy, shut up," Bellamy cuts in. "I'll walk you to the lobby, mom."

Octavia gets up to follow them, but Bellamy gives her a quick look that says he wants some time alone with their mom. She sinks back into her seat. “Bye, mom. Nice seeing you.” There’s no heart in it, really.

“Bye, Aurora. It’s been real.” Murphy doesn’t look up as she leaves, just raises a hand. She doesn’t reply.

**Chat: miller**

**octavia:** please keep an eye on your idiot roommates when they return

 **miller:** will do. Everything ok??

 **octavia:** no idea

 **octavia:** but mom thinks murphy and bellamy are a thing

 **miller:** thank you for this factoid

 **miller:** i will torment them with it forever

 **octavia:** sure but go easy on them today

“It’s rude to text at the table,” Murphy drawls. “Your company will feel unwanted.”

“You’ve been texting Emori this whole time!"

“That was when our company was your mom.” Murphy puts his phone down on the table. “So, that was pretty wild. Do you mind if I ask what happened during the summer?"

"She and I had a big fight over my finals last year. I put more effort into the subjects I enjoyed and wanted to take further this year but she didn't think they were the right ones, and it kinda resulted in us yelling at each other for a good hour. Bellamy didn't want to be in the middle of it, and I wanted out of the house, so we took the trip." Octavia grimaces. "We had fun, but there was always the underlying 'we have to go home after this'."

Murphy doesn't say anything, but he looks sympathetic. 

She sighs. “I honestly can’t tell how badly that went. It’s not good though, is it?”

Murphy shakes his head. “Doesn’t look it. Maybe Raven should have blown us up after all.”

“There’s still time. She probably has explosives ready to go.” Octavia drums her fingers on the table anxiously. “I hate this.”

“Pasta bake was good though,” he says lamely. “If it’s any consolation, the soup your mom got is really watery.”

“Thanks, that helps.” Octavia deadpans. Despite his terrible humour, she’s glad Murphy had come. The tension would have been nearly unbearable without someone else there, and his apparent indifference to the whole situation was actually kind of comforting.

They sit for a few minutes in comfortable silence. Murphy appears to have resumed texting Emori, and Octavia is too busy deliberating over the conversation that just occurred.  
  
"Bellamy hasn't come back," she says eventually. "Maybe she kidnapped him."  
  
Murphy snorts. "He probably just went upstairs."  
  
They start to move to head back up when Octavia's phone buzzes.  
  
**Chat: monty**  
  
**monty:** hey octavia  
  
**monty:** bell's with me  
  
**monty:** he said to text you   
  
"He's with Monty," she says to Murphy. He nods in understanding.   
  
"Ah, that makes sense."  
  
"Does it?"  
  
"Not my story to tell."  
  
"Fair enough," she responds. "I'm headed up there now."  
  
"Alright, well, I'm headed out to meet Emori," Murphy says. "You gonna be okay?"  
  
Octavia nods. "Yeah. Thank you, Murphy."  
  
He smiles at her, pulling her into a hug. It's rare he shows signs of affection towards his friends, so Octavia enjoys it whilst it lasts.  
  
"I'll see you later," she says when he pulls away. He winks in response, grabbing his phone and jacket and taking his plate to the counter. Octavia sends a text to Monty before doing the same.  
  
**Chat: monty**  
  
**octavia:** i'll be up there in 2   
  
She passes Harper in the corridor, giving her a smile and a wave, before entering the boys' corridor and knocking on Monty and Jasper's door. Jasper opens it.  
  
"I assume you're done with whatever was going on here earlier," she says in amusement. Jasper laughs.  
  
"Yeah," he grins wickedly. "It was a good time."  
  
Octavia chooses not to ask, but it's pretty obvious from the bruises forming on Monty's neck what they'd been up to.  
  
"Someone's a biter," she remarks as she collapses on the bed next to Bellamy.   
  
"What?" Monty says, visibly confused. Jasper's face is red and the grin that had previously been on his face disappears. He chooses that moment to excuse himself. Bellamy catches on, and despite the clear sadness on his face, he laughs a little.   
  
"Oh, I get it," Monty rolls his eyes. "Yeah. I can't wait for Raven to see and make really shitty jokes all through Physics."  
  
"I'm gonna get Raven to tell me every joke she thinks of." Octavia tucks a strand of hair behind her ear, smile fading as she takes Bellamy's appearance in. "Now, what's going on?"

“She’s not disowning us or anything,” Bellamy says quickly. “She told me to do what I want, but she’s 'not dealing with the consequences'. Then she left really quickly.”

“Oh, Bell.” Octavia rests her head on his shoulder, watching Monty search the pile of clothes on the floor for a turtleneck. “I’m sorry.”

“It’ll be okay. It was better than expected, I think. And I’ve got you guys.”

“Of course you have.” Octavia pats his back. “What are you doing in here anyway? I don’t think I would have dared to come in after seeing that post-it on the door.”

Bellamy hesitates, and looks over at Monty, who is frowning at his reflection as he pulls hoodie strings to cover his neck. “Monty?”

“Ah, right.” Monty leaves his mission alone for a moment, and perches on his bed. “I’ve got experience with the whole lowkey homophobic parent thing. Though I don’t know how lowkey it was.”

“You don’t have to talk about this,” Bellamy says quietly.

Monty shakes his head. “It’s fine, honestly. Things are getting better. Anyway, my mom is a lot more right-wing than me. Don’t get me wrong, she’s not like...Hitler or anything. But she’s not entirely cool with the gay thing? She thought it was because she babied me too much- that’s actually why I came to boarding school- but I think she’s coming to terms with it now. And my dad’s been great, so it’s not all bad.”

“Oh jeez, Monty,” Octavia starts. “Did she make you come here?”

“She suggested it. I agreed, then Jasper decided he was coming too. It’s not really as bad as it sounds.” Despite what he’s saying, Monty seems rather at peace with the whole thing. “Honestly, Bell, if your mom doesn’t come around, it’s not the end of the world. It kinda sucks, but you have a better family here.”

"Yeah," Bellamy sighs. "You're right."  
  
Monty goes back to searching through his clothes. Bellamy and Octavia look at each other in amusement as they wait for him to find something. He eventually finds a collared shirt that covers it, and throws it on over his t-shirt.   
  
"There we go," he says proudly. "Damage control."  
  
Jasper chooses this moment to enter the room again, obviously back from wherever he'd escaped to in embarrassment.   
  
"Oh, good, Bell and Octavia are still here," he says excitedly. "Miller wants to play Monopoly and we're sorting out teams."  
  
"Since when were there so many of us that we needed teams to play Monopoly?" Bellamy raises an eyebrow.  
  
"Dunno, but it might be more fun anyway," Jasper shrugs. "Anyway, Octavia?"  
  
"Dynamic duo," she responds. "I'm in, Jas."  
  
"What the fuck?" Monty glares at Jasper. "Dude."  
  
"Sorry, my love," Jasper leans over to kiss him. "Octavia is just really, really good at Monopoly. And she doesn't let Murphy get away with his weird illegal tactics."  
  
"Damn right."  
  
"I'll be on your team, Monty," Bellamy pats him on the shoulder. "We'll show these two who the real winners are."  
  
Jasper's eyes widen. "Competition. Come on, Octavia, we've got to talk strategy."  
  
He barrels out the room and Octavia smiles fondly.   
  
"Who needs real families when we've got each other?" she says. As she follows Jasper out and down the hall, she finds that she feels a lot better.  
  
All it took was her friends, and a really competitive game of Monopoly.

**Author's Note:**

> come yell at us on tumblr
> 
> http://bihanschen.tumblr.com/  
> http://mikewheelerprotectionsquad.tumblr.com/


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